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Thursday, February 11, 2016

24-HOUR POTTY PEOPLE: THE SEQUEL

Reports are, um, streaming in describing the collapse of the cafeteria at 550 Madison Ave.—soon to be the former home of Sony Music—and subsequent flooding that damaged the building. Rumors that the flood originated in Joel Klaiman's private bathroom have yet to be confirmed.

 
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HITS LIST: AROUND
THE MAYPOLE
The biz springs into motion. (5/13a)
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MALONE, WALLEN APPEAR NOT TO NEED "HELP" ACHIEVING MILESTONE
A genre-obliterating collab (5/13a)
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RAJ KAPOOR: STACKING THE STARS, MAKING THE ACMs SHINE
Producer putting the finishing touches on Thursday's show. (5/13a)
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WHAT'S NOT TO "LIKE?" HUGE STREAMS FOR KING KENDRICK
No longer keeping his diss-tance. (5/13a)
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NEW RELEASES: "HELP" ARRIVES, SWIFT EXTENDS STREAK
Post, Morgan and the ever-popular POETS (5/13a)
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THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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