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Monday, August 18, 2014

Various Artists

ANTHOLOGY-OLOGY: Have you heard the exciting new band that's set to dominate the top three spots on this week's HITS Album Sales Chart? They're called Various Artists. Yep, the chart will be top-heavy with compilations, namely Disney's Marvel-ous ST Guardians of the Galaxy: Awesome Mix Vol. 1, NOW's Now 51 and Disney's indefatigable Frozen (which gets fresh ice in its bottomless cocktail thanks to a $5.99 iTunes sale). When was the last time three "various artists" sets ruled in album-land? E-mail us the answer and we'll send you a Jim Urie Christmas Mix CD signed by Mark Pearson. (8/18p)

 
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HITS LIST: AROUND
THE MAYPOLE
The biz springs into motion. (5/13a)
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MALONE, WALLEN APPEAR NOT TO NEED "HELP" ACHIEVING MILESTONE
A genre-obliterating collab (5/13a)
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RAJ KAPOOR: STACKING THE STARS, MAKING THE ACMs SHINE
Producer putting the finishing touches on Thursday's show. (5/13a)
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WHAT'S NOT TO "LIKE?" HUGE STREAMS FOR KING KENDRICK
No longer keeping his diss-tance. (5/13a)
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NEW RELEASES: "HELP" ARRIVES, SWIFT EXTENDS STREAK
Post, Morgan and the ever-popular POETS (5/13a)
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THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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