MADE IN THE SHADY!!

Oh sure, there’s controversy. As MTV grapples with his drug-themed video, radio stations get fined for playing "clean" versions of his songs, and politicos continue their "high-profile" pursuit of "cultural" insurgents, Eminem continues to do what he does best: RELEASE #1 ALBUMS!

This week, Em’s wacky band, D12 (Shady/Interscope), bows in the top spot with sales just shy of 370k. A few select jabs from Joe Lieberman and it probably would’ve broken half a mill.

"Eminem once again showed just how much sales power his fan base can deliver," said HMV’s Ken Feldman, who thinks Lieberman is a neighborhood mohel who never accepts tips. (Attn. WASPS: Ask a Jew in the office what that means.) "D12 debuted as a big #1 with us and, with the lack of MTV play, that’s no easy feat."

Rounding out this week’s Top Five is Elektra’s Staind at #2, MCA’s Blink-182 at #3, Columbia’s Destiny’s Child at #4 and Interscope’s "Moulin Rouge" at #5.

But let’s talk debuts. Check out J’s Luther Vandross at an impressive #6, Dragon/Def Soul/IDJ’s Sisqo at #7, Atlantic’s Stone Temple Pilots at #8 and Volcano’s 311 at #10.

"Customers are calling this the best Luther record in years," said HMV’s Feldman, who has never actually spoken to a customer, but another HMV employee told him that during one of those impromptu urinal chats. "The word of mouth is really driving sales."

Other chart bows this week include Atlantic’s Ray J at #18, Parlophone/Virgin’s Gorillaz at #26 and Epic’s Mandy Moore at #33. Meanwhile, the buzz is building over next week’s chart debut by Columbia’s Jagged Edge.

"We’re really looking forward to a huge week from Jagged Edge," said HMV’s Feldman, who possesses the edge of a marble. "They have a monster single with Nelly, which should really power the album."

Ken continued to talk, but we chose to have a more intelligent conversation with a small soap dish. Thank you.