Bartels the Barbarian

BARTELS THE BARBARIAN: Island Def Jam President/COO Steve Bartels welcomes UMG exec Barry Weiss to the label offices by arranging a marathon viewing of Spartacus and The Gladiator before comparing cod pieces during a Halloween celebration that degenerated into a massive toga party. Moments later, the two found themselves under a mistletoe kissing Justin Bieber and chained to Rihanna, then turning into pillars of salt. And you thought the Roman Empire was decadent. (10/31p)

HITS LIST BLASTS OFF
Space is the place for Tay. (4/26a)
SONG STREAMS: SWIFT SETS STREAMING RECORD
What did you expect? (4/26a)
SPRING BREAKOUTS: THESE HEATERS ARE STILL HOT
Who's Boomin who. (4/26a)
SONG REVENUE: “SWEET” SMELLS OF SUCCESS
Life after "Church" (4/26a)
STAGECOACH: SETS TO SEE AND PLACES TO BE
Saddle up, cowboys and cowgirls. (4/26a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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