"The way that Shaggy has turned around has been incredible. It’s currently our #1 title, and it's hard to remember the last album that re-ignited so spectacularly around a second single."
——Mike Fuller, Hastings

BEATLES ARE DOGGED BY SHAGGY

Reggae "Hotshot" Ready To Dethrone Fab Four
Returning the other day to this cesspool we call an office, our dimwitted staff was immediately struck by the massive sales for MCA's Shaggy.

Indeed, gandering at our mega, boffo, monster online Building Album Chart, we immediately determined that Shaggy would have the #1 album of the week.

Almost, but no Jamaican spleef this week, mon.

Sure enough, when those kooky little racks reported their numbers, it was those nutty newcomers from Liverpool sitting atop the album chart, which they'd dominated during the holiday buying season.

"The Beatles were obviously the biggest seller over the holidays, but possibly not the biggest story," said Hastings' Mike Fuller, who pointed to "Barry Lyndon" as proof that Stanley Kubrick was truly prophetic about the year 2001. (Insert guffaw from holier-than-thou film student who works at a Blockbuster Video here, please.)

"The way that Shaggy has turned around has been incredible. It's currently our #1 title, and it's hard to remember the last album that re-ignited so spectacularly around a second single."

What Mikey's gurgling about is the Shag-man's dominating "It Wasn't Me," which has positioned him for a long first-quarter run.

Other Top Five playas this week include #3 "NOW Vol. 5" (Columbia), #4 Limp Bizkit (Flip/Interscope) and #5 Creed (Wind-Up).

Rounding out the Top 10 for the first official week of 2001 are Arista/LaFace's OutKast, No Limit/Priority's Snoop Dogg, Arista's Dido (#8), Epic's Sade and Virgin's Lenny Kravitz (#10).

It's a new year, kids. Fasten your seat belts because here we go agaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin.

HITS LIST BLASTS OFF
Space is the place for Tay. (4/30a)
TAY RACKS UP STATS, OBLITERATES RECORDS
What did you expect? (4/30a)
STAGECOACH: THE FINAL DESERT EXCURSION
Our weary travelers reflect on their adventure. (4/30a)
BILLIE'S BACK WITH BIG WORLD TOUR
Promises to be a Hard ticket to score. (4/30a)
HIPGNOSIS BOARD APPROVES UPPED BLACKSTONE BID
But it ain't over till it's over. (4/29a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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