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"Nelly continues to put up some great numbers as we inch toward a fourth quarter that looks like it’s going to be phenomenal. We surely hope so, because it’s been a fairly quiet summer."
—Hastings' Mike Fuller on the state of the charts.

IT AIN'T FALL YET, FOLKS

Nelly Still Rules And Wyclef Makes A Nice Bow, But The Real Action Starts After Labor Day

Yawn… Would someone please wake us up when the Video Music Awards show begins?

Yes, folks, as the industry awaits MTV's annual unofficial kickoff of fourth-quarter frenzy, this week's chart reads like…well, kinda like last week's chart, and the nine or 10 before that. Hey kids, whaddaya want? It's summer and, outside of St. Louis, things just aren't that happening yet.

In fact, you wacky kids of summer, it's a good thing Columbia's Wyclef Jean debuted at #9 on this week's Top 50 Album chart—otherwise Hastings' Mike Fuller wouldn't be able to throw down such brilliant quotes as the following:

"We saw a solid first-week debut from Wyclef Jean this week."

Wheeedoggie! Move over, Laurence Olivier. Does this guy talk purdy or what?

Of course, it wouldn't be August without another dominant week by Fo' Reel/Universal's Nelly, who maintained his solid hold on the top spot.

"Nelly continues to put up some great numbers as we inch toward a fourth quarter that looks like it's going to be phenomenal. We surely hope so, because it's been a fairly quiet summer," said Fuller as he pondered a career in nuclear physics.

Rounding out this week's Top Five are Britney, Eminem, "NOW 4" and Creed..

Besides Wyclef, other Top 10ers this week include 3 Doors Down at #6, NSYNC at #7, Papa Roach at #8 and the "Coyote Ugly" ST at #10. Yaaawwwwwnnn.

"It will soon be after Labor Day, and you know what that means," said Fuller, as he touched himself inappropriately while watching summer reruns of "Rosie."

In a related story, Vice Presidential candidate Joseph Lieberman uttered the word "heck" this week.

THEY'RE NO
JUAN SOTO
KD and Kyrie got nothin' on these two ballers. (8/16a)
GRAMMY CHEW: WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT BRUNO
Giving Encanto its due. (8/16a)
HITS LIST, YUP
They're the cat's meow. (8/16a)
ON THE COVER:
MO OSTIN
The greatest (8/16a)
WE'RE SORRY TO BOTHER YOU, BUT WE JUST HAD TO TELL YOU
Oh, no, not again. (8/12a)
GRAMMY SEASON
New categories! New rules! New WTF!
THE BIG DEAL
It's the one you didn't see coming.
RAID AT MAR-A-LAGO
"Who took my passports?"
HITS' 36TH ANNIVERSARY SPECIAL
Allow us to apologize in advance.
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