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YULE BE THRILLED TO READ THIS

OK, America, you've finished gorging yourselves on stuffing, so it's time to start stuffing yourselves on Christmas cookies, Santa-shaped chocolates and, where available, roasted chestnuts. A quick gander at the Spotify chart tells us that holiday music is surging, and that means you've already completely lost interest in work and are ready to ride out the rest of this bizarre year inhaling treats and humming Yuletide perennials.

Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas Is You" naturally leads the pack, having jumped to #4 on Spotify's U.S. chart. It's also the only Christmas tune on the Apple Music leaderboard, which is still pretty focused on hip-hop, R&B and Adele.

But on Spotify's domestic Top 50, Mariah is followed in quick succession by Brenda Lee ("Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree," #5), Bobby Helms ("Jingle Bell Rock," #6), Andy Williams ("It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year," #8) and, distributed through the remainder of the chart, Nat King Cole ("The Christmas Song"), Bing Crosby ("White Christmas"), Michael Bublé ("It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas"), José Feliciano ("Feliz Navidad"), The Ronettes ("Sleigh Ride"), Frank Sinatra ("Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Show!"), Ariana Grande ("Santa Tell Me") and Perry Como ("It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas"). Expect this holly, jolly trend to intensify. Burl Ives is doing push-ups in the corner, people.

Once again this year, there are no Chanukah songs on the chart. However, we did have some Belgian gelt last night that wipes the floor with that chalky shit we had as kids.

NEAR TRUTHS: THE KYNCL-LOUSADA DANCE HAS BEGUN
This oughta be interesting... (9/30a)
GRAMMY CHEW:
RAP EDITION
Michael and Kyle find a feast of hip-hop to chew on. (9/30a)
CHART FINAL: VERANO INVADES FALL
Like a broken record... which it is, figuratively speaking. (9/30a)
HITS LIST: COUNTDOWN
TO ECSTASY
We enter the month that was once known as Rocktober. (9/30a)
HIS OWN ARCHITECT:
THE STEVE LACY BUZZ
It was a surprisingly easy "Habit" to break. (9/30a)
GRAMMY SEASON
New categories! New rules! New WTF!
THE BIG DEAL
It's the one you didn't see coming.
RAID AT MAR-A-LAGO
"Who took my passports?"
HITS' 36TH ANNIVERSARY SPECIAL
Allow us to apologize in advance.
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