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SIR LUCIAN’S
WINNING TICKET

The numbers are all adding up for Sir Lucian Grainge: the remarkable 18 straight weeks UMG has scored the #1 album, with a 19th in the bag thanks to Taylor Swift’s just-released Fearless remake; Uni’s towering 38.5% YTD marketshare in the U.S.; and the tens of billions the music group’s upcoming IPO will fetch, as the mega-mogul has his company on fire at the perfect moment. Everything is in the plus column for Sir Lucian—with the glaring exception of the shout-out on the Contents page of our latest print issue, which is worth less than zero. He’d gladly give us a 20 to go away.

NEAR TRUTHS: KINGDOMS
File under: The enemy of my enemy is my friend. (3/26a)
ONE SHINING HITS LIST
She shoots, she scores! (3/26a)
YTD MARKET SHARE
Zeroing in on the elite teams (3/27a)
BEST IN THE WEST:
STEVE BERMAN
High time for another Eminem skit (3/26a)
MUSIC REVENUE TOPPED $17B IN 2023: RIAA
Streaming subscriptions lead the charge. (3/27a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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