No, we're not talking about Donald Trump's urgent appeal to 1950s housewives. We mean the forthcoming HITS Anniversary Special—our 34th, thank you very much (and we're so sorry). That mighty doorstop will include a deep dive into our capacious and mold-infested photo archive, which chronicles, among countless other wonders, the fashion odyssey of Tom Corson, seen here sporting an ensemble that may induce seizures in some segments of our readership. Tom is pictured, we note, with Bruce Kirkland, John Fagot, Richard Marx, Jeff Blalock and Bruce Reiner.
Of course, the Anni will also include much more—including key moments of a truly sucky year—sandwiched between your thoughtfully conceived advertisements. Consider this notice one of several hearfelt apologies.
THE COUNT: COACHELLA, FROM THE COUCH
The coziest way to experience the fest (4/18a)
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THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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