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MAINTAINING HIS COMPOZIER

Following the first of his three sold-out shows at L.A.'s Wiltern, Columbia artist Hozier suddenly realizes why the Gypsy woman told him to avoid the West Coast as he finds himself corralled into a photo op with VP/Editorial Geek Simon Glickman. The HITS nerd offered to share his recently penned essay tracing the influence of French post-structuralist thought on the works of Sonny Boy Williamson. "Em, that sounds grand," Hozier replied. "I'll bet the nice security man would like to read it too."

NEAR TRUTHS: KINGDOMS
File under: The enemy of my enemy is my friend. (3/26a)
ONE SHINING HITS LIST
She shoots, she scores! (3/26a)
YTD MARKET SHARE
Zeroing in on the elite teams (3/27a)
BEST IN THE WEST:
STEVE BERMAN
High time for another Eminem skit (3/26a)
MUSIC REVENUE TOPPED $17B IN 2023: RIAA
Streaming subscriptions lead the charge. (3/27a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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