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ALTERNATIVE FACTS AND PLAQUES

"Contrary to reports in the biased liberal media, I have a lustrous, wavy, full head of hair," declared Capitol's Scott Greer during this plaque presentation commemorating 1m adjusted sales of Jon Bellion's "All Time Low." Later, the following people learned the alternative fact that their sub sandwiches were actually oysters and caviar (l-r): the label's Brittny Silberman, VP Promo Joe Rainey, manager Harrison Remler, Greer, Bellion, EVP A&R Mike Flynn and manager Chris Zarou.

THEY'RE NO
JUAN SOTO
KD and Kyrie got nothin' on these two ballers. (8/16a)
GRAMMY CHEW: WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT BRUNO
Giving Encanto its due. (8/16a)
HITS LIST, YUP
They're the cat's meow. (8/16a)
ON THE COVER:
MO OSTIN
The greatest (8/16a)
WE'RE SORRY TO BOTHER YOU, BUT WE JUST HAD TO TELL YOU
Oh, no, not again. (8/12a)
GRAMMY SEASON
New categories! New rules! New WTF!
THE BIG DEAL
It's the one you didn't see coming.
RAID AT MAR-A-LAGO
"Who took my passports?"
HITS' 36TH ANNIVERSARY SPECIAL
Allow us to apologize in advance.
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