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GERVINO OUT, MIN EXPLAINS, WE TRANSLATE

The Industry Bible’s print editor in chief, Tony Gervino, has been sacked, news that was conveyed by President/CCO of The Entertainment Group Janice Min in an internal memo that we obtained and have subsequently translated, in excerpted form, for your edification.

Dear Staff,  [Attention Underlings]

As you can sense, Billboard’s impact and size is expanding by the second. We just wrapped a hugely successful all-star Latin Conference in Miami and televised the Billboard Latin Music Awards on Telemundo.
[Although we are hemorrhaging money I got to hang out with Pitbull.]

Digitally, this past month we recorded our second-largest audience total in history. 
[I told you clickbait headlines about Nicki Minaj throwing shade at the Kardashians would work. Always a good look for American Airlines.]
 
Mike Bruno, our Senior Vice President of Content, and I have discussed at length how we best and most effectively continue to grow this organization.
[And by “grow,” we mean “shed.”]
 
Tony Gervino will be departing Billboard as its print editor in chief. 
[It was either that or I take the bullet for losing $20 million last year.]

The print content and covers of Billboard have undergone an unbelievable transition that we will continue …
[I’d put the fucking Hamburglar in the Power 100 for a big enough check.]
 
I’d like to personally acknowledge Tony’s contributions toward making this possible and thank him.
[I know he’ll learn much in the next phase of his journey under the bus.]
 
Our magazine — especially its cover and influential readership — is among the many platforms we have that will continue to be championed and treasured.
[Especially now that we don’t have to cover the music business.]
 
Mike and I are confident and exhilarated by the power of the brand, as we hope you are too, and by our stable of best-of-class content creators here who will continue to innovate and grow with us.
[Continue cutting and pasting celebrity tweets, rehashing TMZ stories and musing on Sam Hunt’s sweater closet if you don’t want to be shitcanned too.]

Please don’t hesitate to reach out to me or Mike with any questions or thoughts.
[That’s what Tony did.]

Best,
[Watch your ass.]

Janice
 
[P.S. I don't know who this John Amato is, so stop asking me about him.]
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