AMAZON'S AMAZIN'
AFTER-HOURS BUMP

Following an unexpectedly positive Q2 earnings report, Amazon's stock zoomed up 83 points (nearly 18%) in after-hours trading. The results follow a difficult month or so for the e-tail emporium, which also happens to be one of the biggest earthly vendors of recorded music; its much-ballyhooed "Prime Day" fell well short of expectations and competition from startup Jet.com (headed by ex-Amazon exec Marc Lore) has caused some murmurs.

But with a 20% year-over-year bump in revenue ($23.2 billion, vs. $19.3 billion in Q2 2014), Amazon exceeded analysts' expectations and saw a trading bonanza that has sent its stock to 567.00 after hours after a 491.66 opening.

Jeff Bezos was so happy he ordered a vaporizer with free shipping.

HITS LIST: AROUND
THE MAYPOLE
The biz springs into motion. (5/13a)
MALONE, WALLEN APPEAR NOT TO NEED "HELP" ACHIEVING MILESTONE
A genre-obliterating collab (5/13a)
RAJ KAPOOR: STACKING THE STARS, MAKING THE ACMs SHINE
Producer putting the finishing touches on Thursday's show. (5/13a)
WHAT'S NOT TO "LIKE?" HUGE STREAMS FOR KING KENDRICK
No longer keeping his diss-tance. (5/13a)
NEW RELEASES: "HELP" ARRIVES, SWIFT EXTENDS STREAK
Post, Morgan and the ever-popular POETS (5/13a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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