CLARIFICATION FROM MANAGEMENT: Under continuing pressure from the wives and families of Bud Scoppa and Simon Glickman, HITS wishes to retract our statements of last week describing both as “losers.” We also regret forcing them to pose for a photograph in the bowels of the cesspool (yes, the cesspool has bowels) wearing costumes that make the prisoners in Les Miz look well-dressed by comparison. Further, Scoppa and Glickman want to make clear that, should anyone reading this be considering inviting either of both to a business lunch, they will use proper silverware and will not engage in a food fight, as long as it’s not Dutch treat. Thank you for your understanding in this matter. (6/11a)
THE COUNT: COACHELLA, FROM THE COUCH
The coziest way to experience the fest (4/18a)
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THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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