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FIVE ON FIVE: Pop & HissGarrick Kennedy, taking note of those VEVO-record 9.3 million views racked up by One Direction’s “Best Song Ever” yesterday (see below) and hailing the clip as “sort of brilliant,” has come up with a list of “five things we learned about One Direction while watching it: 1. Zayn looks amazing in drag. Probably the only boybander who could easily cut it on RuPaul's Drag Race. Fierce, honey. 2. Louis pulls off a rather impressive impersonation of Tom Cruise’s seedy Les Grossman character from Tropic Thunder. It’s so seamless I had to pause the video and do a Google search to make sure Cruise wasn’t doing videos now. 3. Unlike their cookie-cutter predecessors, the members of One Direction remain quite horrific dancers. 4. Thanks to his ability to channel a saucy choreographer, Liam should be the new favorite. Sorry, Harry. 5. Realizing there is still one member you can’t identify.” Wait a minute, what about Niall? (7/24a)

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