IVANA: i'm compiling a list of things programmers NEVER want to hear. top 2 is "the band is on the warped tour" and "they have 304,008 myspace friends"
LENNY: these are things they should want to hear.... it may be "an inconvenient truth" but it is truth nonetheless
IVANA: i think the overwhelming feeling is that programmers will never lose ratings by the songs they DON'T play

IVANA & LENNY TRY TO CHILL OUT

But Given the Broken AC and Their Chronically Uptight Demeanors, That Ain’t Gonna Happen
IVANA: it's a cruel, cruel summer...
LENNY: whose song is that
IVANA: bananarama
LENNY: are they alternative?
IVANA: useta be
LENNY: so, while the world is facing global warming, and while our office air conditioning is out, i would still like to discuss two albums of interest to me
1. hinder
2. red jumpsuit apparatus
IVANA: the floor is yours
LENNY: both are selling big, both are just beginning their alternative radio journeys, both are going to be big hits
IVANA: there's no controversy--i agree completely
LENNY: so, here's the controversy..... IF IT IS SO DAMN OBVIOUS, HOW COME THE RADIO GENIUSES ARE FIGHTING-FIGHTING-FIGHTING? whatthefuck?
IVANA: i'm not sure they're "fighting" per se, i just think there is no room
LENNY: well, there should be room for "obvious smashes"
IVANA: it's taking FOREVER for songs to research and become hits (ask bill carroll about 30 seconds to mars), so nothing moves out. and then there are the "automatics" that may or may not be hits, so there’s your playlist
LENNY: i understand it is tough out there, but when records (red) jump out there, there should be no "hindrance." nice wordplay, eh?
IVANA: when rja sells 30k this week, programmers will notice
LENNY: it will and hopefully they will. and hinder keeps selling 20k plus every week and gets bigger every week... both of these albums will be in the damn top 30 in sales..... people need to take notice, and i am here to (red) jump up and down. so don't hinder my rant
IVANA: i'm going to throw up
LENNY: from the heat?
IVANA: your "wordplay" is obscuring the message: programmers need to pay attention to what's really breaking out there
LENNY: exactly, they have to know and react to their audience..... this happened for awhile when fallout boy exploded in sales and they didn’t want to play it
IVANA: i'm compiling a list of things programmers NEVER want to hear. top 2 is "the band is on the warped tour" and "they have 304,008 myspace friends"
LENNY: these are things they should want to hear.... it may be "an inconvenient truth" but it is truth nonetheless
IVANA: i think the overwhelming feeling is that programmers will never lose ratings by the songs they DON'T play
IVANA: i hope it's just the dog days of summer..
LENNY: doggone it. what we need is a “summer breeze”
IVANA: or an arctic monkey
LENNY: i love the arctic monkeys, they should be this year's “boys of summer”
IVANA: do you mind if i ignore that?
LENNY: you have been ignoring me for years, no change
IVANA: so joey scoleri is everything rock AND alternative at hollywood now
LENNY: and he has hits. breaking benjamin, plain white t’s and more on the way that we cannot discuss yet
IVANA: jesse mccartney?
LENNY: paul mccartney
IVANA: i went to see lazlo at his new digs at kndd seattle. he's the greatest
LENNY: and he actually plays currents, i hear
IVANA: indeed he does. he'll do great
LENNY: well, at least rock n roll lives in seattle
IVANA: kexp, the public station, is amazing. as is kmtt and kisw. it's a great radio market
LENNY: altho it does rain a lot
IVANA: i'm not suggesting we relocate hits to seattle
LENNY: good, because i cannot afford all that coffee
IVANA: and the rain would cramp your golf schedule
LENNY: they have good salmon
IVANA: so if i had the proverbial farm to bet, i'd wager big on the following artists: lily allen and peeping tom
LENNY:
oh yeah, you sent me lily, but i never listened, sorry
IVANA: it's huge for kcrw and kexp
LENNY: what label is it on?
IVANA: not sure where it will land here, it's on regal in the uk. peeping tom is on mike patton's own label, ipecac. i also think ted will have a big hit with the new hurt single
LENNY: i loooooooooove the new hurt single
IVANA: and epic will break 18 visions and cartel
LENNY: winner, winner
IVANA: my other faves are pete yorn (shocker), IV thieves, the kooks, camera obscura, the pipettes, and death cab for cutie’s cover of julian cope’s “world shut your mouth”
LENNY: i never knew you liked pete yorn
IVANA: i've kept it quiet
LENNY: ok, i won't reveal your secret....
IVANA: the new killers single is a monster (duh)
LENNY: you are really out on a limb now
IVANA: i've heard it compared to everything from meat loaf to chris deburgh (blame me) to springsteen, but it's getting 100% positive calls
LENNY: which is very good, considering two out of three ain't bad
IVANA: i hate you
LENNY: and now it's time to say goodbye, cause i was born to run
IVANA: i was happier this weekend when my power was out
LENNY: M I C... see you real soon… K E Y.... why because we like you
IVANA: you frighten me
LENNY: M O U S E
IVANA: the lunatics have taken over..
LENNY: toodles
IVANA: go back to the beach, PLEASE
LENNY: with frankie + annette?
IVANA: say goodnight, gracie
LENNY:
goodnight, gracie
AND THE 2025 GRAMMY NOMINEES ARE...
And away we go. (11/8a)
BEY LEADS ARRAY OF FEMALE STARS IN GRAMMY NOMINATIONS
Adding up the numbers (11/8a)
SONG REVENUE: SEVERAL TYPES OF MONSTERS
Metaphorically speaking (11/7a)
OF PONIES, PRINCESSES AND UNICORNS: CHAPPELL'S SNL TRIUMPH AND BEYOND
Changing the pop narrative (11/5a)
NEW & DEVELOPING ARTISTS: Q4
Meet the class. (11/7a)
NOW WHAT?
We have no fucking idea.
COUNTRY'S NEWEST DISRUPTOR
Three chords and some truth you may not be ready for.
AI IS ALREADY EATING YOUR LUNCH
The kids can tell the difference... for now.
WHO'S BUYING THE DRINKS?
That's what we'd like to know.
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