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EVERYBODY SING: ROUND & ROUND
What Comes Around (In This Music Roundup) Goes Around—We’ll Tell You Why
 FIRST TOM AND NICOLE, NOW THIS…
The New York Post reports that virginal songstress Jessica Simpson has broken up with 98 Degrees heartthrob Nick Lachey. The 21-year-old Simpson had hooked up with the 27-year-old Lachey in a union of attractiveness that could have been the brainchild of Lou Pearlman. "We had hoped the pair would marry and procreate," said one industry yenta, "thus producing a super-popstar of godlike attractiveness. Now, we must put all our faith in Justin and Britney."

WILL POOR CRAFTSMEN BLAME TOOL?
Tool announced that prog-rock elder statesmen King Crimson would open for the band for seven shows in August, reports MTV.com. Tool will support the release of its third album, "Lateralus" (due May 15), with a brief four-city stateside tour. The band will then take its show to across the pond until returning for the August dates. Rumors that ELP, Gentle Giant and Hawkwind would join Tool later in the summer went unconfirmed.

DIGITAL FEMMES
The Violent Femmes today announced the release of their new album, "Something’s Wrong," exclusively in MP3 format. Like previous releases by They Might Be Giants, The Donnas, Arrested Development, DJ Spooky and others, the album is available only through EMusic.com. The 22-song album contains live tracks, outtakes and rare demo recordings, as well as covers of Bob Dylan’s "Positively 4th Street," The Police’s "Every Breath You Take" and Paul Anka’s "My Way." "I suppose in the old days, this stuff would have been available as bootlegs, B-sides and tracks on compilation albums," said Violent Femmes frontman Brian Ritchie. "In other words, impossible to find and enormously expensive collectors items. Instead, Violent Femmes and EMusic have considerately gathered all of this music together and it can be yours with the mere tap of a computer keyboard. That's progress." Expect the tracks to show up on Napster within the hour.

JACKPOT!
Pamela Lee and Kid Rock went wild Vegas-style, according to The New York Post. Over the weekend, the pair (Lee and Rock, that is) hit a hot streak at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino’s blackjack tables, during which the two were apparently "all over each other." It wasn’t long before they disappeared into a one-toilet bathroom reserved for high rollers. After complaints from players waiting to use the facilities, a security guard roused the now-glowing pair from the john. Apparently, the two were a little confused as to what constituted membership in the mile-high club.

NEAR TRUTHS:
THE CAKE AND
THE CANDLES
Marketshare machers. (10/27a)
KENDRICK INKS WITH UMPG
Lamar enters the House of Jody. (10/27a)
YTD MARKETSHARE: AND THE WINNER IS...
It's a lock. (10/27a)
MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, PT. 8,761: SURGERY IN THE TIME OF COVID
Planning for an Election Day hopped up on painkillers. (10/28a)
ONCE IN A LIFETIME
Vote. Do it now. (10/28a)
RAINMAKERS 2020
Bring your umbrella.
GRAMMY OUTLIERS
Mulling possible surprises.
HALLOWEEN IN QUARANTINE
Why not wear a mask indoors?
ELECTION 2020
What drugs will help us get there?
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