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THIS AIN'T YOUR DADDY'S
MUSIC ROUNDUP
From A Pistol-Whipping To Being Buried In A Kiss Kasket In 900 Words Or Less

IT'S THE PERFECT FATHER'S DAY GIFT!
Anyone who has ever claimed they would "die for Kiss" should be careful what they wish for. Gene Simmons has added the Kiss Kasket to the band’s arsenal of merchandise. The Kasket—which is decorated with a large photo of the band, the Kiss logo and the words "Kiss Forever"—costs about $5,000, and can be ordered through the band’s website or select funeral homes. For those who still have a few years left before the big Kiss-off, Simmons said the coffin also doubles as a handy-dandy beer cooler. Just wait a few days for the ice to dry before the funeral.

AS IF THE GLOVE WASN’T ENOUGH
Jacob the Jeweler
, the man responsible for many top rap artists’ flashy hardware, is currently working on a glittering breastplate for Michael Jackson, according to NY Daily News. The armor, which may cost the Already-Gloved-One more than $2 million, is reportedly for Jackson’s still-unconfirmed performance at Madison Square Garden in September (see rumor mill). The design will allegedly be a Jackson family crest, featuring a lion on one side and a unicorn on the other—much to the chagrin of Bubbles, who was left out of the design entirely. Jackson’s first name will be written below the lion, while his last name will be under the unicorn. Adding to what must be the most person-specific family crest in history, Jackson’s self-imposed nickname, "King of Pop," will be placed in the middle of his name. Above it will be a circle divided in quarters, featuring a glove, a crown, a fedora and a Grammy Award. The entire design will be made of diamonds, because anything less would be uncivilized.

WHIPPING NOT RELATED TO OUR SEX LIVES
Da Brat
received 12 months probation, a $1,000 fine and 80 hours of community service on Monday (6/11) in Atlanta for pistol-whipping another woman at a nightclub in March 2000, according to a spokesperson for the Fulton County District Attorney's office. Police say the incident occurred after the woman refused to leave the VIP lounge of the Chili Peppers nightclub, after being requested to do so by Da Brat and her entourage. The rapper struck a deal with prosecutors, lowering her charge of felony "aggravated assault" to misdemeanor "reckless conduct" in exchange for pleading guilty in the incident. In doing so, Da Brat avoided possible jail time, and prosecutors pretended not to notice that she and her entourage were carrying concealed weapons.

MAYBE THIS YEAR, WE’LL SEE THE WHOLE SHOW
Eminem
and Outkast lead this year's nominees for The Source’s third Hip-Hop Music Awards. Both acts received five noms, and face off in the Album of the Year category alongside Nelly, Jay-Z and M.O.P., as well as in Single of the Year, with Ja Rule, Mystikal, Nelly and Ludacris also nominated. "Slim Shady" and Outkast also bump heads in the Video of the Year category, for "Stan" and "B.O.B." respectively. Eminem is nominated for Artist of the Year (Solo) and Lyricist of the Year, while Outkast is up for Artist of the Year (Group) and Live Performer of the Year. Snoop Dogg, Nelly and Jay-Z each have three nominations, Mystikal, Ja Rule, Ludacris and M.O.P. received two, while LL Cool J will receive the Lifetime Achievement Award. The invite-only show will be held on Aug. 20 in Miami and will air August 28 on UPN. The HITS staff has already been barred from attending, to prevent the melee caused at last year’s event.

BECAUSE WE CAN’T GET ENOUGH EMINEM
Apparently Eminem is already paying off stars to influence Hip-Hop Music Awards votes. Sir Paul McCartney told CNN’s Larry King on Tuesday (6/12) that he liked Eminem’s music. Although McCartney admitted to not listening to much rap, he said he likes "some of the Eminem stuff," calling it clever. "I like the rhythm. I like the attitude and I can imagine if I was a young kid now, I'd like that," the former Beatle said. "I especially like that ‘Ice Ice Baby’ song he did a few years back. It was quite amusing."

THE NOT-SO-FRIENDLY SKIES
Nelly
filed a complaint with TWA on Monday (6/11), saying he received poor treatment during a flight, due to race. The incident occurred while the rapper flew first class to Denver on Saturday, after the St. Lunatics Celebrity Basketball Benefit in St. Louis. He claimed a flight attendant refused to give him a pillow, and when he got up to find one, the pilot ordered him back to his seat and threatened him with arrest. Minutes later, the attendants gave Nelly two pillows, but police officers were waiting for him at the gate in Denver. When the rapper then tried to get the pilot's name to file a complaint, police told Nelly to leave or face arrest. "The way it escalated was a result of me being a black man," he said. TWA spokesman Mark Abels denied Nelly's account of the situation and said the airline had a witness to back them up. Officials, however, are skeptical of the objectivity of the witness, who has been identified as white pride leader David Duke.

PRIMARY WAVE CHECKS INTO
THE FOUR SEASONS
Mestel walks like a man. (10/22a)
UMG IPO SET FOR '22
And Q3 figures look good as well. (10/21a)
TOP 20: TAY'S FOLKLORIC RUN CONTINUES
A Swift return to #1. (10/21a)
REVENUE CHART: “LEMONADE” AND OCEAN SPRAY
The Rumours are true. (10/23a)
GRAMMY PREVIEW:
PHOEBE BRIDGERS
Could she be this year's left-field anointed one? (10/23a)
RAINMAKERS 2020
Bring your umbrella.
GRAMMY OUTLIERS
Mulling possible surprises.
HALLOWEEN IN QUARANTINE
Why not wear a mask indoors?
ELECTION 2020
What drugs will help us get there?
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