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THE TERM "MUSIC NEWS" IS VERY SUBJECTIVE

But You Wouldn’t Be Reading This If You Didn’t Know That

A PERFECT CONTEST
Who needs a million bucks when you can meet A Perfect Circle? Virgin Records and indie retailer Looney Tunes have teamed up to find "The Perfect Survivor." On September 9 and 10, 15 contestants will have to outwit, outplay and outlast each other, while trapped in the window of the West Babylon, NY record store. The grand prize is a trip for two to Austin, TX, where the winner will meet the band and get an autographed guitar and lesson from APC. Contestants will compete in various immunity challenges, and will be voted off by customers. Said Looney Tunes' Bill Loehr: "We can't serve them rats and roaches. We're not savages. Making them come to Long Island is cruel enough."

SMELL THE CREATIVITY
Spinal Tap
and Spin.com are celebrating the re-release of the classic mockumentary "This Is Spinal Tap," by letting fans help design a new cover for "Smell The Glove." The winner will receive a purple Stratocaster autographed by the band. The winning entry will be broadcast on the site sometime in September. Pictures of a nude woman on all fours being forced to smell a leather glove are not encouraged.

RING AROUND THE ROSEY,
POCKETED FROM THE POSIES

Seattle popsters the Posies have been burgled! An unknown suspect stole more than $4,000 from the backstage area of the Knitting Factory in New York during the band's 8/23 gig. As a result, the band has organized the Posies Emergency Crime Recovery Raffle to help recoup the loss. Up for grabs are Jon Auer's Onyx acoustic guitar and Ken Stringfellow's Washburn acoustic guitar, as well as test-pressings of the band's "Failure" CD. Tickets cost a paltry $40 each, and can be purchased via check or money order to the Posies c/o Barbara Mitchell, 4509 Interlake Ave North #201, Seattle, WA 98103.

BLOOD AND MUDSLINGING
Smithereens
' front man and Reform Party U.S. Senate candidate Pat DiNizio is crying "equal time." DiNizio is demanding to be included in political debates between New Jersey opponents Jon Corzine (D) and Bob Franks (R). In a statement, DiNizio said: "I'm calling my campaign a crusade. It's a crusade of the people against special interests, and I demand, on behalf of all Americans to be heard. I will not be silenced by the tyranny and monopoly of the two-party system, and I am demanding that debates take place and that I am not excluded from this vital aspect of the political process." Corzine responded: "I love that band the Smithereens, especially that wacky Morrissey." Frank's rebuttal stated: "Go drink some Cappio, you beatnik freak."

SPOTIFY SINGS A SONG OF ONG
Meet the streamer's new editor in chief. (10/22a)
HITS LIST, FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION
Grammy-themed, just like our latest print magazine. (10/25a)
GRAMMY COUNTRY ALBUM CONTENDERS
With Kacey out, who's a likely nominee? (10/22a)
STREAMING SONGS
MADE "EASY"
Who said she wouldn't get streamed? (10/22a)
U.K. CHARTS: ADELE'S NEW RECORD
Massive on both sides of the pond. (10/22a)
ADELE ADELE ADELE
Adele; Adele Adele?
ADELE ADELE ADELE ADELE ADELE ADELE
A... dele?
ADELE ADELE
Adele Adele; Adele.
ADELE ADELE ADELE ADELE
(Adele.)
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