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A MUSIC ROUNDUP
IN FIVE EASY PIECES

Where A Number Faints, DMX Writes And Bon Jovi Rubs Shoulders With Placido Domingo

WE WERE THINKING MORE ALONG THE LINES OF NO. 2
Slipknot
has canceled its fall headlining tour because of exhaustion, just a few days after the trek was announced. The band's constant road schedule has reportedly taken its toll on at least one of the band's masked players. A Slipknot member recently collapsed at LAX and was ordered by a doctor to stay off the road and get some rest. Because Slipknot's members wear masks and have adopted numerals as their performing aliases, sources could not determine the Slipknot member who fell ill. "It was probably Slipknot No. 3 or No. 8," an insider said. "Whoever it was had better be well by Halloween. That's Slipknot's time."

GIVING ROCK A BAD NAME
Bon Jovi
will embark on its first U.S. tour in five years, which will kick off Nov. 3 in Charlotte. Bon Jovi's latest, "Crush," has sold more than 5 million copies worldwide. The band's staying power is testimony to the fact that there really is no good new music out there, an observer said.

NOTHING MORE EXCITING THAN OPERA NEWS
Placido Domingo
said he'll skip the world-renowned Wagner festival in Bayreuth next year after clashing with the composer's grandson. The opera star told Focus magazine that he had other obligations that conflicted with director Wolfgang Wagner's rehearsal schedule for "Die Walkuere" next June. "Unfortunately it was not possible to find a compromise on the rehearsal dates with Mr. Wagner," he said. Wagner had a different story. "He didn't like my idea of putting him in a Valkyrie suit," Wagner said. "But have you seen his man-teats? They cry out for a shiny breastplate!"

WE CAN ALL LEARN A LITTLE SOMETHING FROM A 29-YEAR-OLD
Rapper DMX has inked a publishing deal with Harper Entertainment for the rights to his autobiography, reports MTV.com. "DMX: A Dogz Life" will chronicle the 29-year-old rapper's rise from a Yonkers, NY housing project to his current status as a Platinum-selling artist. The book will also include self-penned prayers DMX recites to himself every day and extensive passages taken from his personal notebooks. "We're planning a big media blitz for the fall release," said a Harper spokesman. "Of course, we're not expecting DMX to show up for the events we've planned."

YATES FOUND DEAD
TV personality Paula Yates, girlfriend of the late INXS singer Michael Hutchence and former wife of Bob Geldof, was found dead at her London home on Sunday, police said. She was 40. Scotland Yard said the cause of death was not immediately known, and that an autopsy would be scheduled. Detective Inspector Mike Christensen said there were no signs of violence in the house. She had a daughter, Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily, with Hutchence, and three children with Geldof.

HITS LIST: AMPERSANDS
Dynamic duos (12/3a)
TAYLOR'S TREMENDOUS YEAR
She'd make one helluva CEO. (12/3a)
THEY CALL THE WINDFALL MARIAH (HOLIDAY EDITION)
Ch-chingle bells (12/3a)
SONG REVENUE:
BOWS OF HOLLY
Adele is money. (12/3a)
UTA MUSIC EXPANDS IN NASHVILLE
Reshuffling the deck (12/3a)
CHESTNUTS
Roasting.
STOCKINGS
Stuffing.
PIPERS
Piping.
SANTA
Coming.
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