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DEVIL MADE HIM DO IT
High School Student Taken To Court Over White Zombie T-shirt
Welcome to Westerly, Rhode Island. A sleepy little seaside town. The water laps gently along the shore. Birds soar peacefully without a care, not unlike the conscientious middle-class kids who make their parents proud. Could this be the perfect romping ground for...The Devil!!??

What happened? Was the prom queen possessed? Did the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse ride into town demanding fried clams? Are dogs and cats sleeping together? Did Rod Serling come back from the dead? Nope. Something far worse.

In 1998, when Robert Patrick was a sophomore at Westerly High School, he did the unthinkable. He wore a "White Zombie" T-shirt to school. School officials tried not to panic. Mindful of the health and safety of the other students, Parker was sent home and ordered not to wear it again. That should have ended it right there. But the devil works in mysterious ways. Even more mysterious than the HITS "Daily Double" editorial department, if you must know.

Robert Patrick contacted the ACLU. And now, for the past two years, a state hearing has dragged on, costing the town $60,000 in legal fees as the school committee is determined to stop the Prince of Darkness from infecting their community. Rev. Paul DesMarais testified that the T-shirt has the number 666 on the back, which as a priest, he knows as the devil's pager number and now every kid "can hook up and get jiggy with the Evil One."

"If we lose this," the man of God said, "what's to prevent kids from wearing T-shirts that show Britney Spears in a skimpy little skirt revealing her shapely legs covered with fine downey blonde hairs that move so gently with the slightest gust of wind?"

The band "White Zombie" is now defunct, with Rob Zombie now a solo act. And you thought Satan was a Billboard subscriber.

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