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HITS’ NASTY NES TO BE HONORED IN SEATTLE

Rap Editor Has To Go Elsewhere For Praise
Sometimes we try to rise above and soar with eagles. Rarely do we succeed. So when one of our pitiful staff members does well, we have to sing his praises 'cuz it makes us look good too.

HITS Rap Editor Nasty Nes will be honored June 20th at the grand opening of the Experience Music Project inside the Jimi Hendrix Museum in Seattle. Nes, who looks a lot like his idol, Bruce Lee (except for the shades, physique and haircut), will return to his hometown for the opening, at which his phat dookie gold chains and old radio playlists will be showcased. The well-respected rap icon is our #1 resource for updates on the haps in the hip-hop world and translating terms like "rollin' on Ds," "hittin' corners" and "phat dookie chains" into English.

"I'd like to thank all my peeps in Seattle for their support since day one. Like my hero Bruce Lee, I want you to be proud that another true minority has made his dream come true," said Nes. "Perhaps now Lenny and Dennis will see what a commodity I am and give me a raise."

lenny beer',390,400);">lenny beer',390,400);">Lenny Beer, HITS Editor-In-Chief, commented, "Who is this guy? What do you mean we have a rap section?"

Publisher dennis lavinthal',390,400);">dennis lavinthal',390,400);">Dennis Lavinthal was on vacation and unavailable for comment.

A pioneer of the rap world as far back as 1980, Nes was the first to bring hip-hop to the Seattle airwaves and was also the first on the entire West Coast to have an all-rap show. In addition to his demeaning job hat our fish wrap, Nes also heads up Crazy Pinoy Promotions and will make his Hollywood motion-picture debut this year in "Down To The Last Minute" starring IMX, as well as the upcoming martial-arts comedy "The Dubbed Action Movie."

HITS LIST: AMPERSANDS
Dynamic duos (12/3a)
TAYLOR'S TREMENDOUS YEAR
She'd make one helluva CEO. (12/3a)
THEY CALL THE WINDFALL MARIAH (HOLIDAY EDITION)
Ch-chingle bells (12/3a)
SONG REVENUE:
BOWS OF HOLLY
Adele is money. (12/3a)
UTA MUSIC EXPANDS IN NASHVILLE
Reshuffling the deck (12/3a)
CHESTNUTS
Roasting.
STOCKINGS
Stuffing.
PIPERS
Piping.
SANTA
Coming.
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