BIBLE SURVEY EXPURGATED

Caving to the pressure, the bible has dialed back—way back— the salaciousness quotient in the posted results of its confidential survey following a firestorm of outrage in the media and across the music biz. There’s no Bieber bashing, and gone are titillating questions like “Who is the most overpaid/devious/press-hungry executive in the music industry?” or “Who do you believe: (i) Ke$ha (ii) Dr. Luke?”

The most tabloid-worthy remaining questions among the 10 that appeared late yesterday on the mag’s site are the last two: “Would you give up your current job for a similar-paying position at Apple or Spotify?” (54% said they’d make such a career move) and “How long do you give Tidal?”—which likely got the go-ahead because Tidal-bashing has become a popular pastime in both the media and the industry.

No explanation was given for the change or for the early appearance of the heavily edited results, which were originally scheduled for Sept. 11.

TOP 20: JUST TRUST US
A second sonic Boom (4/18a)
ON THE COVER:
AARON BAY-SCHUCK
AND TOM CORSON
Bunny's hoppin' again. (4/17a)
NEAR TRUTHS:
PRIMARY NUMBERS
Hats off to Larry (4/17a)
TAY’S FORTHCOMING DEBUT: WE ARE TORTURED BY SPECULATION
So many questions (4/18a)
THE COUNT: COACHELLA, FROM THE COUCH
The coziest way to experience the fest (4/18a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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