OUR STUPID NCAA CONTEST: THE WINNER

With Duke's victory in the NCAA final last night we have another winner: Tony Brummel of Victory Records, whose perfect bracket in the Stupid NCAA Contest--brought to you by Capitol and iGen--entitles him to the spoils. Tony will receive an Apple Watch, which should go some way toward offsetting the humiliation of having his name and likeness appear on this website. Congrats to Tony and thanks to everyone who participated.

Tony is pictured here at Victory HQ with his 1969 Stan Mikita jersey as his Blackhawks go into playoff mode. As for the hockey bracket, we'll, uh, get back to you.

TOP 20: JUST TRUST US
A second sonic Boom (4/18a)
ON THE COVER:
AARON BAY-SCHUCK
AND TOM CORSON
Bunny's hoppin' again. (4/17a)
NEAR TRUTHS:
PRIMARY NUMBERS
Hats off to Larry (4/17a)
TAY’S FORTHCOMING DEBUT: WE ARE TORTURED BY SPECULATION
So many questions (4/17a)
THE COUNT: COACHELLA, FROM THE COUCH
The coziest way to experience the fest (4/18a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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