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"Being able to take the opening of ‘The Wedding Planner’ and couple it with the huge TV and press blitz for the album really demonstrated how well-oiled the
Epic marketing machine is."
——Vince Szydlowski, Virgin Megastore

"J.LO" JIGGLES TO THE TOP

Jennifer Lopez Has #1 Album, #1 Movie
And #1 Most-Wanted Boyfriend
Her romantic life is as public as Madonna's, her body is as ogled as Britney's— so why shouldn't she assume her rightful place among pop's reigning queens?

Oh yeah, there's also her music. Whatever the reason, Jennifer Lopez has the #1 album in the country this week, with sales just a hair south of 300k. Of course, being Jennifer Lopez, she also has the #1 film in the country this week—but that's the beauty of this whole J.Lo thing.

"Being able to take the opening of ‘The Wedding Planner' and couple it with the huge TV and press blitz for the album really demonstrated how well-oiled the Epic marketing machine is," said Virgin Megastore's Vince Szydlowski, who is considering changing his name to Bill Szydlowski so that people can pronounce it with less difficulty. "Since the setup was so impressive, her #1 debut with us really came as no surprise."

And while J.Lo was not as mystifying to Szydlowski as walking and chewing gum simultaneously, monster debut weeks by J Records' O-Town (#5) and Bad Boy/Arista's Dream (#6) had some retailers looking way back to the days when the Beatles were dominating the album chart. By the way, that boy band dropped to a still-mindboggling #4 this week.

The Top Five was rounded out by MCA's Shaggy, last week's #1, slipping a notch to #2, but actually selling more than last week, and Hollywood's "Save The Last Dance" soundtrack, which held the #3 slot while also increasing in sales.

Next week's big releases include…oh, wait a minute, there are no big releases next week. OK, then the week after we have…nope not that week, either. That's OK, because in three weeks there's…actually, there are no big releases scheduled for then, either.

"Welcome to the first quarter," said Szydlzzzyyyksski, who suddenly became worried that he wouldn't have enough money to buy a vowel.

NEAR TRUTHS: KINGDOMS
File under: The enemy of my enemy is my friend. (3/26a)
ONE SHINING HITS LIST
She shoots, she scores! (3/26a)
YTD MARKET SHARE
Zeroing in on the elite teams (3/28a)
BEST IN THE WEST:
STEVE BERMAN
High time for another Eminem skit (3/26a)
MUSIC REVENUE TOPPED $17B IN 2023: RIAA
Streaming subscriptions lead the charge. (3/27a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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